126. The Return of the Suit
When this unemployment journey started, man, I had a plan. I spent a portion of the day learning, a portion of the day exercising, a portion of the day applying for jobs and interviewing. That lasted maybe a week. As certainty about my new job increased, I began to regress to a twenty year old version of myself. By now, I'm close to buying cases of Lebatt Blue and sending drunk ICQ messages. (Ask your grandpa if you don't know what ICQ is).
This mid-year, mid-life and middling crisis left me with a heavy enlightenment. My dream of getting paid for doing nothing was a farce. Even though I am more relaxed than I have been in a long time, I realize now the power of purpose, whatever that purpose is. Even though I was still volunteering during this time, there was a hole that no amount of video gaming, binging or lackadaisical traipsing around the neighborhood could fill. I don't know if part of it is the guilt of seeing my wife going to work while I get to have fun with the cats, but my eyes are open to the possibility that I may need some structure when I retire. Fingers crossed I'm wrong about it, though!
It's going to be hard not to have her around during my work hours!