131. Hammer Mode

I wouldn’t give anyone a bj in an alley for access to a smartphone. Using this slim, utilitarian and utterly disrespectful definition of addiction, I am not addicted to my smartphone. In almost all other definitions, I probably am (scratches neck). These days I’m frequently using twitter for political news, instagram for art and facebook for friends and family.

For my wife’s birthday I left my smartphone delights behind as we travelled up to Michigan’s north (not north north, but north enough for a weekend trip). We had a great time consuming and sight-seeing all this beautiful state has to offer. We touched alpacas, drank some wine, got soaked in a pier and I was able to show her the part where Johnny Depp gets sucked by a bed in Nightmare on Elm Street. A win in every conceivable way.

I am definitely a technofile and a techno-apologist, I believe my life in particular has been enhanced and improved exponentially due to consumer electronics. I enjoy nature somewhat, but I also enjoy being able to google “Can I eat this red and white mushroom” at any time. My wife, in contrast, is definitely part nymph. She can identify trees and birds with such confidence that she often outsmarts any tour guide we may have. Me, I can barely tell birds and squirrels apart.

One of the biggest joys in my life is growing old with her. From her, I am learning about nature, an everlasting culture of friendship, wild femininity and beauty. From me, she’s learning absolutely nothing, but don’t clue her in to this inbalance. I got a good thing going. 

Extra Panel:

We appreciate our 19th century fench novelists in this household.


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