172. Glucose Intolerance

Every relationship is fake and I don’t know why, because the truth is funnier. Even I, lover of vulnerability and all things taboo, don’t post about our weekend-destroying arguments about sponges. Oh wait, perhaps I do sometimes.

Am I being a cynical doo-doo head? Yes, of course. But I’m also speaking from experience. Walk back a divorce in modern times. Go back through the public postings and you'll find yourself going from "That wretched witch took all my money" to "Enjoying the sunset with my booboo" in a few swipes. Where’s the in between? How did it get from point A to point B so quickly? String Theory? More like creative editing.

I find this a bit peculiar, but it actually makes things more understandable to me. That family you see always dancing in perfection, whereas it be in movies, books or your social feed... it’s about as real as farmed salmon is pink. Like a red herring, its image is set to distract. In the same way a jellyfish is not a real fish, these families are not real families. Why am I fixated on fish today? Honestly, I don't know. In unrelated news, I'm on painkillers today due to having my first adult grade back pain.

The point is that there seems to be some oblique truth to Anna Karenina’s opening lines: “All happy families are alike; each unhappy family is unhappy in its own way.” All families you think are happy are acting the same way, the way other presumed happy families act. Fakey McFakersons, the lot of us. The good news is that, armed with this knowledge, we can rebel and make our own version of happy families, celebrating our warts and whims!

Extra Panel:

This is us. 



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